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December 29, 2005Predictions for 2006BUMPED TO TOP 1) After a few off-years, due to A-Rod’s disingenuity (I still say he broke the curse when he slapped a ball out of the first baseman’s glove and then tried to lie about it - Fie on A-Rod!) The NY Yankees will reclaim their rightful spot as World Champions. 2) Directly after the ‘06 elections, the press will be forced to acknowledge that Iraq’s situation is positive, and that America has done something heroic there. They will acknowledge this because Hillary will need to be able to crow that she - alone among the Dems running for president in ‘08 - “had the wisdom to support staying the course,” in Iraq, and is strong on defense. 3) President Bush will not be impeached over the FISE/NSA matter; his poll numbers will continue to rise as Americans - no longer distracted with Fitzmas - follow the story and realize that the NY Times and much of the Fourth Estate have become a Fifth Column. 4) The WaPo will pull back from that story. The NY Times, mad with hate, will run over a cliff with it. The L.A. Times will save itself. 5) Some people will look at New Orleans, Detroit, Philadelphia and other cities wherein liberalism has become entrenched, and they will discover that the Great Society has done little good for poor urban communities, in all these decades. They will begin to suggest that the Democrat party has for too long held too much power within those communities while giving them nothing but lip service and paranoid suggestions. As some black Democrats become Republicans, Wolf Blitzer will wonder how they can leave the party in good conscience, when they are “so poor and so black.” Morgan Freeman, having finally had enough, will smack him silly. 6) Maureen Dowd will pull out of her 5 year depression, take the bottle of ciprol out from between her knees, have surgery to unlock her jaw, enabling her to actually open her mouth when she speaks, and start dating a conservative man, on a dare. Stuck on wrong, and horrified to find herself actually falling in love with him, Maureen will dump him and announce that she has stopped looking for a man to love. Her politics, her principles and her public will keep her warm at night, approximating something like love, to her. She will, however, write a really excellent book profiling her mother, Mary McGrory and Katharine Graham. She will not invite me to edit it, nor will she thank me for the idea. But that’s okay. 7) CBS will ignore my excellent suggestion and hire Katie Couric to read the CBS Evening News. Surprised by her high negatives and low ratings (after the initial curiosity bump) they will trail NBC news, but not ABC. Stagnation and mediocrity will follow. The expensive kind. 9) Somebody’s gotta get serious with Iran. W will do it. Ungrateful Europe and leftists will curse him for it, while wiping their brows in relief before driving to their next Bush-bashing engagement. 10) Paris will burn, coverage will be scant. 11) Howard Dean will not be DNC chair by the end of the year. He will be replaced by affable eye candy of some sort, capable of bumper-sticker-speak. John Kerry will make all sorts of noises about running again for the WH, but at the last possible moment, he will declare himself uninterested due to his deep committment to the people of Massachusetts. A quick search through his Beacon Hill garbage will reveal a bloody horse’s head. 12) Rick Santorum will lose his bid for re-election. He will enter a seminary program for the permanent diaconate in the Catholic Church, and write books. 13) Rudy Giuliani and Jeb Bush will both say they’re not running for president in ‘08. One of them will be telling the truth. 14) John McCain will continue to straddle midde groud wherever he can, and the press will continue to let him think he could be president. They will encourage him to run as a third party candidate. McCain will change his middle name to Perot. 15) The Democrats will not pick up any new senate seats in ‘06, but Olympia Snow and a few other GOP Senators will jump the aisle, giving the majority to the Democrats, who will declare filibusters “unpatriotic, obstructive and unserious.” 16) Bill Clinton’s health will again be in the news. Chelsea will become engaged. There will be talk of a “White House Wedding.” All of this will serve to “humanize” Hillary who will, at some point, cry in public. Sort of. It’s going to be a ghastly sight. 17) Eliot Spitzer will (ugh) be the next Governor of the State of New York. George Pataki will become the guy to call when David Gergen can’t make a booking. 18) Cindy Sheehan will not go quietly away. Even if the press tries to make her. 19) Pajamas Media will find its way, slowly but surely, as the whole media terrain shifts and shudders with transitions. It will take time. 20) Oprah Winfrey will begin talking about running for political office. Seriously. 21) At the end of ‘06, the big hole at Ground Zero will still be a big hole - a testament to the serious void in real leadership which both encouraged Al Qaeda and dogs our nation, still. UPDATE: National Review Online has a symposium of predictions (H/T Betsy.) Pretty funny and interesting stuff. As I come across more year-end predictions, I will post them here. More: http://theanchoressonline.com/2005/12/29/predictions-for-2006/trackback/ 19 Responses to “Predictions for 2006” |
The Academy Awards, having been no fun for a few years, will utterly tank in the ratings, but Hillary Swank will wear something fabulous that only she could pull off. Russell Crowe will not win an Oscar for Cinderella Man, even though he was pretty dang phenomenal in the role of James J. Braddock.
December 29th, 2005 at 3:41 pm
OK, this is just too damn good- I just about keeled over at the Kerry- horses head references and MODO…
December 29th, 2005 at 4:02 pm
Good grief — I hope you’re wrong about #15. (Though if Snowe alone jumped, I’d be delighted.)
December 29th, 2005 at 5:07 pm
#16 - a ghastly sight indeed! Whillakers - I’m still wiping tears from the laughter.
December 29th, 2005 at 9:01 pm
#16 - LOL!
December 30th, 2005 at 8:22 am
A great list, but Anchoress, as much as I want #1 to be true, who exactly is going to pitch?
Also, as SC&A point out, the horse’s head….that’s funny!
December 30th, 2005 at 9:55 am
[...] NRO and the Anchoress have a look ahead at the year that will be… [...]
December 30th, 2005 at 11:07 am
The Office Pool - Predictions and Prognostications
The Anchoress also put forth her predictions, and some are quite interesting. I’ll focus on a few…
December 31st, 2005 at 7:07 am
All Things Beautiful TrackBack The Fickle Finger Of Fate 2006
Inspired by The darling Anchoress, here are a few predictions of my own for 2006.
The Democrats, hampered by their inability to sound a common theme on Iraq, and also outfoxed by a well-publicized midyear withdrawal of several thousand troops from Iraq, will pick up seats in the midterm elections, but will not do nearly as well as they originally expected. Their wise leader Howard ‘The D Stands for Defeat’ Dean, will cease to be of importance, as the challenge of two non-contradictory thoughts at once becomes simply too much for him.
December 31st, 2005 at 3:53 pm
[...] I headed over to RedState.org to comment on this particular prediction by The Anchoress: 14) John McCain will continue to straddle midde groud wherever he can, and the press will continue to let him think he could be president. They will encourage him to run as a third party candidate. McCain will change his middle name to Perot. [...]
December 31st, 2005 at 3:55 pm
[...] All Things Beautiful Ann Althouse has an interesting Supreme Court prediction. From your lips to God’s ears. The Anchoress Dean Esmay The Indepundit Ezra Klein A (somewhat) amusing list of predictions from Sigmund, Carl, and Alfred Matthew Yglesias [...]
December 31st, 2005 at 7:05 pm
“Disingenuity” in all its forms is one of my favorite words. I am not at all surprised to see it here.
Oh, and the bags under Hilary Clinton’s eyes will attack and dismember Larry the Cucumber. New sitcom to follow. Possibly a miniseries. Called “Edgy Tales.”
December 31st, 2005 at 8:44 pm
Some of these are interesting. I’d like a little more info on what you know about Bill Jeff’s health. What have you been hearing? Inquiring minds want to know?
I don’t think any GOP senators would jump to the Rat Party. They might strike out with a few Rats to start a new endeavor. Even the most moderate GOP senator can see where the Rats are heading.
#12 and #15 are contradictory predictions. :>
December 31st, 2005 at 10:22 pm
Buckeye - Good point. Maybe Santorum will not run and some other Republican will win. Heh. (Kidding).
December 31st, 2005 at 10:24 pm
A quick search through his Beacon Hill garbage will reveal a bloody horse’s head. [sigh]
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Whether your predictions prove true or false, whether your faction wins or loses, be well and have a Happy New Year, Anchoress.
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And remember, always, that your heart is a mirror and what you point it toward will be inside you as well as outside you.
January 1st, 2006 at 8:25 pm
[...] The Anchoress has 2006 predictions. My favorite two: 3) President Bush will not be impeached over the FISE/NSA matter; his poll numbers will continue to rise as Americans - no longer distracted with Christmas - follow the story and realize that the NY Times and much of the Fourth Estate have become a Fifth Column. [...]
January 4th, 2006 at 7:41 pm
Trackback from A Straight Shot of Politics
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http://shotofpolitics.blogspot.com/
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When I read this, I managed to keep a straight face and, since I had less evidence than I like to support my inner mirth, I didn’t contest it. As my Conservative blogging friends know well, I’m a big fan of using evidence to support an opinion, a bigger fan, I think, than most of them are.
I now have the evidence…
February 26th, 2006 at 6:03 pm
[...] Many bloggers are making predictions for 2006 including The Anchoress who also has many links to interesting predictions. I am hesitant to make them about people because life is not ours to control but to live in the best way we can. [...]
October 30th, 2006 at 11:37 pm
[...] Melanie Philips on Britian’s very screwed up priorities and on its going wobbly, too. Both are must-reads. When I wrote my predictions for 2006, I made a lot of errors (so did freaking A-Rod…). But, sadly, I got this one all too right. [...]
January 1st, 2007 at 1:35 pm
[...] Anyway, we moseyed over to The Anchoress and noted her post on New Year’s resolutions. In addition to an excellent roundup of interesting links and other year end predictions, she speaks of her own attempt at gazing into the crystal ball. In 2006, I made mine. They were stinkers. Clearly I am no sage or prophet! Although I did get numbers 7,8, 10, 12, 13, 17, 19 and 21 mostly right. Of course…pretty much everyone would have predicted the same, so I’m no good at this game! [...]