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June 26, 2006Limbaugh and Viagra, now the kiddies snicker
Okay, so, Rush had Viagra in his bag and his doctor didn’t prescribe it in his name because if you’re Rush Limbaugh (or Bill Clinton or whomever) and you know you have a gazillion childish guns pointed at you - at all times - you’d rather not have some pharmacist blab in some internet forum that you’re using Viagra, or herpes medicine or genital wart salves or whatever. Perfectly understandable. Sadly, now we’ll be treated to a few days of people sniggering and making snide, adolescent jokes about Rush (probably in tandem with jokes about Bob Dole, or as he is called at my son’s school, “Bob-Dole-Sex-Machine“) and about how conservatives raise flags because they can’t raise anything else, how a rising snide lifts all boasts, how Rush needs to pull himself together, take himself in hand, get ahold of himself, how it’s not-hard out there for a wimp, how Ann Coulter is walking around with Rush’s missing testosterone, how Rush keeps talking about elections because he’s fixated on…well, you get the point, and a sensitive point it is, too. We’ll have to endure the usual suspects basically acting like 5 year-olds sitting around the table saying “poopyhead” and imagining that they’re terribly funny, while they laugh and drip and dribble, and we roll our eyes and wipe up their wee spills. Personally, I think the best way for Rush to stop the thrust of this thing in mid-launch is to stiffen his resolve and laugh at himself. It worked for Hugh Grant, and when you laugh at yourself you leave your enemies limping. I’m sure Rush will stand firm and take it like a man, reminding all of us to get a grip, because there are more important matters at hand. Regular readers know that I have recently disagreed with his take on illegal immigrants. Still, I think Rush is getting the shaft, here. I think it sucks that the fellow had to have his less-than-hardline tendancies spread out before the world. People are entitled to some “zone of privacy” is what Mrs. Clinton said, isn’t it? But then some people are raised to that zone, and some are not. Something tells me that if Al Franken were in the same awkward, uncomfortable position attention would not be paid, prosecutors would not be called, headlines would not blare. There would be no shouts, grunts or giggles. Franken would not find himself in a tight spot. It would remain a smallish matter. In honor of Rush, though, and because I expect him to be treated very badly by many people, today, I’ll rerun a post that was rather uplifting, come to think of it, and complimentary to him, in a way. And it was meant to raise all of to our highest potentials! Naughty dreams and Rush Limbaugh Just got reminded of this and thought I’d share it with you, because it’s pretty funny, and I am having one of those sleepless nights. I had a friend who was also struggling with insomnia. One night she finally went to bed early and got into a really good sleep - but it didn’t last. She called me up in the wee small hours, wide awake and sounding upset. “What woke you up?” I asked. “I had a sex dream about Rush Limbaugh, and it scared the hell out of me! I might never go back to sleep again!” She said. “But you don’t even listen to Limbaugh,” I said. “I know! I know! But the scary thing is…he was GREAT! I’m like, totally in love with Rush Limbaugh right now! This is awful!” This particular friend had once before called me up very upset because she had a sex dream about Bill Clinton, whom she didn’t like. It troubled her because for a brief time afterward, she found him sexy, but then she got over it. So, you see, she is a bipartisan sex-dreamer. Perhaps this is what we need to bring America back together…some bi-partisan sex-dreaming on both sides! Egad…so this means that in order for America to come back together, Democrats will have to dream sexy about Dubya, Mitt Romney, Ann Coulter, Tom Selleck and Elizabeth Dole…and Republicans will have to dream about John Kerry, Al Franken, Helen Thomas, Angelina Jolie and Kathleen Blanco. Do it, America! If you love your country, sacrifice a dream or two for her future! Did I mention I have insomnia? Sorry…just can’t sleep! Insomnia is my friend. I love my insomnia. Michelle Malkin has lots of links and wonders where are all the privacy mavens?. She also quotes Hillary Clinton, who just yesterday was gassing on about privacy in America. Oh. Rush. Not entitled to privacy. Gotcha. I keep forgetting that double standard thing. It’s okay to discuss his private medical stuff. Welcome ABP and Junkyard Blog readers, while you’re here, please look around. Today we’re also discussing the rescue of Catholic Music and the absolute hoo-hah that is global warming. UPDATE: Rush was smart enough to laugh at himself, apparently. Audio is here. Good job, sir. http://theanchoressonline.com/2006/06/26/limbaugh-and-viagra-now-the-kiddies-snicker/trackback/ 16 Responses to “Limbaugh and Viagra, now the kiddies snicker” |
June 27th, 2006 at 12:29 am
Anchoress, what lovely satire! A wonderful play on words. I doubt you missed one or let it go too early (if you get my drift)
Way to go!
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What a shame he had to have this splashed all over the news. I guess now he can get the prescription in his own name. Hey, at least he’s not like the guy with the penile implant who had an erection for over 10 years! Maybe now we know why Marta left him!
June 27th, 2006 at 12:49 am
Well, don’t we know what the standard is? If it’s a liberal who gets “outed”, “that’s not of our business, it’s just about [insert practice here], nothing to see, move along.”
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But if it’s a conservative, “anything goes! Take his gonads and show’em spiked in the public square! That’ll teach him…”
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But watch out. He’ll outsmart them. Again.
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Besides, I couldn’t care less if he had that stuff in his luggage… He’s single: he can date whomever he wants; he’s not “trapped” to anybody! And I can also surmise that he likes it that way, and that marriage is not made for a guy like him.
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So, if he wants to have a little fun on the side, why chide him for it? He’s old enough: he can take good care of himself, thank you very much!
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Sigh…
June 27th, 2006 at 5:02 am
So Rush had a viagra prescription? Big woo. It’s not illegal. I’ll bet if John Murtha was found with Viagra, the usual suspects would give a wink and say “Way to go, Big Guy”
June 27th, 2006 at 8:02 am
[...] [...]
June 27th, 2006 at 10:40 am
As Ron White says, when life gives you lemons, find someone whose life has given them vodka and have a party. I suggest that Rush’s people get together with Pfizer’s people and get their vodka and lemons together.
June 27th, 2006 at 11:35 am
Is that all women ever think about? Sildenafil does have other medical uses, you know, like treating pulmonary hypertension, improving high altitude exercise performance, increasing nerve activity associated with cardiovascular functions, treating the prostate and lower urinary tract symptoms (LUTS) associated with prostate enlargement, etc., etc.
June 27th, 2006 at 11:57 am
Have to admit I’ve popped a few of those “Blue Thunders” myself on occasion. They are great enhancers, and sometimes it great to be 19 again, but at the same time, “last” a lot longer than you did at 19. I don’t have E.D., and I bet Rush doesn’t either. Most of my encounters with my most beloved is without the stuff, (and without the ensuing headache). But….once in a while….why not?
June 27th, 2006 at 12:06 pm
Tee-hee…:-) Yes, Darrell, as evidenced by my 3000+ essays, that’s all we think about!
June 27th, 2006 at 1:45 pm
This is the first I have heard of this. I think it is no big deal.
But then I have never listened to an entire Rush show.
June 27th, 2006 at 3:07 pm
I thought so!;-)
June 27th, 2006 at 3:30 pm
An Irishwoman of a “certain” age visited her physician to ask his help in reviving her husband’s libido.
“What about trying Viagra?” asks the doctor.
“Not a chance”, she said. “He won’t even take an aspirin”.
“Not a problem”, replied the doctor. “Give him an Irish Viagra. Drop it into his coffee. He won’t even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went”.
It wasn’t a week later that she called the doctor, who directly inquired as to progress.
The poor dear exclaimed, “Oh, Faith, Bejaysus and Begorrah!
T’was horrid. Just terrible, doctor!”.
“Really? What happened” asked the doctor?
“Well, I did as you advised and slipped it in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate! He jumped hisself straight up, with a twinkle in his eye, and with his pants a-bulging fiercely! With one swoop of his arm, he sent the cups and tablecloth flying, ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there, making wild, mad, passionate love to me on the tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute nightmare!”
“Why so terrible?” asked the doctor, “Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn’t good”?
“Oh, no, no, no, doctor, the sex was fine indeed!
‘Twas the best sex I’ve had in 25 years! But sure as I’m sittin’ here, I’ll never be able to show me face in Starbucks again.”
June 27th, 2006 at 4:45 pm
Darrell,
You just made me laugh so hard, that there is a bit less chest-cold phlegm in me than a minute ago! LOL!
June 27th, 2006 at 5:38 pm
[...] UPDATE: The Anchoress at her finest. [...]
June 27th, 2006 at 5:45 pm
Great Darrell…just printed it out, cause its too much to remember. I’m going to share this with my golfing buds, who I know will really, really enjoy the story.
June 28th, 2006 at 3:30 am
When Rush Says That He Loves “24″…
He really means it. Update: Rush evidently has a much better sense of humor than his critics. Maybe he was reading The Anchoress….
October 28th, 2006 at 2:14 pm
[...] UPDATE: Good Lord, people, I do not HATE Rush! I’m impressed as all get-out to see how loyal his listeners are, but after perusing my email, I feel I really must make it clear that I am not a “Rush-hater,” by any stretch of the imagination, and I offer as evidence my defense of him in the Great Big Viagra Debacle and here (sort of) as well! [...]